The Art of Appreciation: How Gratitude Transforms Leadership and Creativity

I always start my keynotes by asking the same question: What does it mean to find your voice? The answers vary, but words like "confidence," "authority," and "respect" are usually at the top of the list. Don't get it twisted: learning to speak confidently, command authority, and inspire respect are important skills (I've based my whole career on them).  But what if the real superpower isn't any of these...what if it's gratitude? 

I've spent 15 years researching the human voice and coaching speakers and singers. From Broadway to Hollywood and classrooms to boardrooms, one thing remains consistently true: the strongest leaders aren't the loudest or the most forceful. They're the ones who make others feel seen and heard. They lead with appreciation, and that simple shift, from needing to be heard to truly hearing others, transforms everything. Communication. Creativity. Trust. 

I spend my days helping women find the courage to speak up. I prep interviews, client meetings, pitches, and speeches for rooms of 5 to 5,000. I tell my clients, when the nerves arrive (and they will arrive), the difference between the excited butterflies and the terror moths is preparation. Brain science tells us that when we deem something "good" for us, we're more likely to both pay attention to it and to spend time on it. We're more likely to prepare. When you acknowledge the people and forces that make your opportunity for success possible, when you root that "good" in gratitude (rather than ego), you're more likely to fully prepare. You're also more likely to succeed. 

Gratitude also literally changes how our voices sound.  When we speak from appreciation instead of anxiety, our tone relaxes, our breath steadies, and our authenticity comes through. Listeners can feel it. They lean in. Our voices become less about proving and more about connecting. That’s when communication stops being transactional and starts being transformational.

I often remind my clients to also be grateful for failure, to "fail spectacularly." Failure isn't the end; it's the ultimate new beginning. You tried, it didn't work, great! Take what you learned and adjust. Then try again, supported by your new knowledge and new experiences.

In leadership, this might look like saying, "Thank you for challenging my idea, you just made it better." In creative work and entrepreneurship, it's being grateful for the whole messy journey, instead of only the polished outcome. It's the journey: the failures, the adjustments, the redirects, that make you relatable.

When success appears easy and instant, it also appears unattainable and unrelatable. When the ladder of success only fits one, it's not a ladder anymore, it's a pedestal.  When you meet failure with gratitude, when you're thankful for your journey with all its ups and downs, you step down off the pedestal and widen the ladder so more people can climb. 

Practicing the art of appreciation doesn’t require grand gestures. It starts small and specific:

• Name the unseen. Thank the intern who proofed the document, the colleague who kept the meeting moving, the family member who made space for your dream.

• Speak thanks aloud. Don’t assume people know their impact. Tell them. Words of gratitude have power only when shared.

• Lead with acknowledgment. Before diving into corrections or next steps, begin with what’s working. Gratitude opens the ears for growth.

• Practice vocal presence. Take a breath before speaking, literally inhale gratitude for the opportunity to connect. It shifts your energy and how others receive your message.

When gratitude becomes part of our leadership language, everything changes. Creativity flows more freely because people feel safe to risk and fail. Teams communicate more honestly because appreciation builds psychological safety. And individually, we become more resilient. Gratitude reminds us that we are part of something larger than ourselves.

"I don't know how she does it." "The secret to having it all." "Behind every great man..." Women have been conditioned to appear perfect, to downplay achievements, and to fear taking up space. But gratitude transforms that. When a woman says, “I’m grateful for my success and for the opportunity to share what I've learned,” she steps into her power with empathy and authority. 

So, as this season of thanks approaches, speak it out loud. Let your gratitude be heard!  Because when we lead with appreciation, our voices don’t just command attention; they create connection.

And that’s where true power lives.